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Friday Funny.


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What do you call a black man standing on the moon??????

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An astronaut.

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A Montana Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name.

"Fred," he replies.

"Fred what?..." the officer asks.

"Just Fred," the man responds.

The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break, and write him out a warning instead of a ticket.

The officer then presses him for the last name.

The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it.

The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. "Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?"

The biker replies, "It's a long story, so stay with me. I was born Fred Johnson, from Missoula, Montana. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD.

"After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through School, got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS.

"Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD.

"Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD. Then the VD took away my 'Johnson', so now, I'm, Just Fred."

The officer walked away in tears, laughing.....

 

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                                                                                           THIS IS A TRUE STORY

My friend John lives next to an intersection with a four way stop that people are all ways running. It's gotten so bad that he put in surveillance cameras and on  two different occasions videoed cars blowing through the intersection and hitting his cars parked on the two different streets. One driver was drunk and the other fell asleep at the wheel.

Last week he was watering his lawn/dirt when a car drives through the intersection without stopping.

John yells at the driver,"Nice stop, @$$#*))"!

 

The Driver who happens to be in his 20s, slams on his brakes and asks "What's your problem"?!

.

John, "There's a school a block and a half from here and I know you live only two blocks from here. It would be nice if you made a full stop and look both ways or you might run a kid over".

 

The Driver, "Well I slowed down".

 

John, "Yah, but you didn't stop".

 

The Driver, "What's the difference"?

 

John, "I'm going to get a bat and when I get back I'm going to beat your @$$. Then you can tell me if you what me to slow down or stop".

John thinks the Driver got the point.

 

 

 

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