My cancer returned.

 

Started bleeding Monday night light then it continued to get worse. Wednesday morning I got up went down talked to Mark informed him I'm heading to the hospital. Then woke Jakob up and also informed him. Got dressed and hauled for McCall ID to the hospital. Spent most of the day up there with tests and CT scans. Then informed i was discharged and to pack my stuff and haul to Boise ID. I made it here by 7pm. I'm in good hands even talked to my doctor this morning and should have my surgery by this evening.

 

Now at this time I'm hoping for all M73M.com  staff to step up and keep an eye on the site. I'll do what I can from here. I do have my laptop. One thing I'm short of is my updated password book. Opps. 

 

I did contact @Doubletrouble and he's going to keep eye on the site too.

Good morning all. It has been a big mental thing for me the last day. Processing that my life will change from here on forth. Like simple things like taking a shower, you have to figure out what to do with two drain bags? How about getting dressed where do you put the bags just so not everyone has to see them? The fact I'm now going down to Mark's place to explain how I do injector installs so he can finish my job for me. The fact I've got to get up every 3 hours or so to drain my bags. All these are just things I have to learn to handle in different ways. When I was in the hospital and the nurse did it all for me, then when I got home you are redeveloping your method of life to work with your medical issues. So yesterday was full of phone calls contacting clients to inform them I'll no longer be doing the wrench work on their vehicles but I have Mark that will be filling my shoes. Now sitting down with Mark and redeveloping a system where he is taking care of the shop jobs and how and when I need to go down and talk to him in regards to jobs/tasks so he can keep jobs flowing for me. 

 

No, I'm not getting depressed or worried about what has happened to me. This is the change of life I'm going to go through. I've still got plans to do many things yet. Just some of the stuff I want to do won't be done by my hands any longer. 

 

I see my life getting simpler in a way. Consider it was always me out in the front lines doing the grunt work, figuring out problems. Yes, this is true. Now I've got a full crew that all came together to aid during this time and some are willing to take over some of my tasks and responsibilities. Way less stress for me. The more I've been talking to friends (local and website) and adopted family I'm learning quite a bit very rapidly. 

 

Then like today I know that Mark is going to pull the front tire off of Beast and run it in for me to fix the slow leak. Simple things like that are just out of my reach right now. My medical problems right now have me very limited in what I can do and where I can go. This will not last forever either. I do have to move forward and get my next step of medical treatment planned out so I can get to the final healing stage.

 

I appreciate all the love and kind words from all of you guys and gals out there. I'm going to make it and live on and still be you Cummins Guru. I've just got a rough patch to 4x4 through but Mopar1973Man doesn't know the word quit. I'm going to get through this rough patch and move on.  

Mike do they make clothes with some inside pockets for this? Could you start making this product once figured out the best way?

3 hours ago, JAG1 said:

Mike do they make clothes with some inside pockets for this? Could you start making this product once figured out the best way?

Give me a chance to get that far in my medical then I'll be learning about those right now I can't remember all the medical terms on what that's called. I know I'll figure ways out to protect my bag. Still in all doing things like transmission rebuilds or clutch installs is not going to happen again for me. Yeah doing like my own oil change, sure I know I'll be back to servicing some things in my truck on my own. I still have to remember I've got to keep a sterile field around my port when I get it. Not like in the past when I let diesel fuel run down my arm into my shirt like I've done so many times in the past.  

 

But hey... My mind is full of information and different things. I can still support all of you guys out there in the world. Nothing is stopping me now from being here on the website and helping where I can with everyone. Seriously it does help to keep my mind busy with thinking about solutions for problems on these trucks. Even just being on the phone with some of you the phone call helps me settle down and get my mind right. Like I just remembered I was starting this post and got busy so... I'm returning to finish and then realize I need to check on Mark with my injector job in the shop and he already got my front tire tied into the back of Thor to be repaired. It's been really strange to just give orders to people and get stuff done. I'm not the type to do that... But my mini-family here is Jake, Mark and myself.  

Yesterday was a much better day. I managed to get sleep as well as last night. As for my abilities and function, it is a change in figuring out typical daily activities. Being I've got the two ports in my back I need to keep those dresses dry and clean. What do I do with my bags? Yeah, just a simple task of hopping in the shower has more steps.

 

Then my clients are coming and paying up and picking up vehicles. It is still a mental thing for someone to take over my job and have the trust the job would be done right. Which is timely and needed. 

 

So yesterday just headed to McCall for banking and groceries. I welcome the time to leave the house and be out. I've been cooped up for quite a while considering my stay in Boise ugh.

 

Give me a little bit to heal up and I'm going to be busy here. I will admit the ports in my back are sore most of the time from laying on them. Thank Gwad for cannabis which great pain relief without constipation problems. Strange enough even after the scrapping of my bladder there is ZERO pain which is weird to me. My ports are always floating 3-4 just enough to annoy me. As I type I'm sitting Indian style on my bed.

 

There are several of you who reached out to me and checked my mental status. Go for it I'll just have to tell you all I'm just crazy and looking forward to the changes that are coming. Really? Yup, I'm more or less retiring for wrenching. 40 years of turning wrenches I could easily give it up. Will I miss it a little bit but I look forward to developing my coding skills in AlmaLinux and Interworxs.

 

So how did I deal with the stress and anxiety of all this well... there is another side of me some know about and others it's a secret. I started playing with what some call cosplay. Well, I've created a character named Titanium. Titanium is based on the song Titanium. Speaks about being shot down but I never fall. So when stressful things were happening I could whip out my photo and show photos of me dressed up as Tiranium. This created a following just in the hospital. I've been requested to be in full makeup and dressed up. The hospital staff is shocked at how positive and how I'm dealing with the stress of all this but I'm still moving forward and looking forward to my new life that should have 100% survival rate and 0% of cancer return. 

 

If I see replies I'll post the photos. Then you all might find out how crazy I am. 

 

 

 

 

@Mopar1973Man, your waiting fir replies??? You know you want to share.

Good morning gang... I'm still getting up and doing my thing. Sadly with what I deal with on m,y bladder bags sleep is tough to get if you are waking up every 2 to 3 hours to drain these bags. Other than that I am doing good and handling what is coming at me for now. I will admit with the timeline between past cancer runs to this time it is horrid that both land on Christmas and New Year's. I will admit I've had to battle my demons with my mind about this. I get lonely and have too much time to think about things and my mind can get my anxiety fired up thinking about what's happening then I'm looking for anyone to have a conversation with to get past my mind filling with all the negative things. Then realized that my Christmas / New Year was ruined again by my cancer. Then I can go down worrying about how I'm going to pay my bills. 

 

I have to say Thank You to the members here on the website for being there for me... @IBMobile @IBMOBILE-JEN these two have had some conversations with me trying to keep me going. Then @Doubletrouble I know I shocked him by telling him about my cancer but he's been there to just listen to my tales and just being that ear that just listens. Then there is the entire "Blynn Family" which Tianne Blynn is my bookkeeper for Mopar1973Man.Com her family is been there covering my back and making sure things are being handled. Then there is @MUDDY he's back too but not at the capacity as before but I can just call him up and discuss what going on as well. Great way to just mellow out. @JAG1 he's made contact too trying to lighten my load mentally as well. I know there is several other members as well but these off the top have made multiple calls just to keep up with me. 

 

I want to say Thank You to all the members and all get well wishes... It does keep me going. Thank you all and much love in return to you all who stand behind me in times of need!

Remember Mike, life is what you make it. Staying interested is important. Ea. month day or week I look at a new problems that exist with my tool set up my trucks or my e mountain bike, my shop, anything because I love solving problems. Sometimes it means designing something and going to a fabricator or machinist or simply making something from what metals or wood I have here. Sometimes it's simple as changing the lighting or switches in my shop.

 

What I'm saying is keeping goals and figuring out ways to solve them is about life.

 

When you get old you get used to getting up to do something around the house or go out to the shop to work till your tired enough to sleep again. This happens a lot when your 72 and you get used to a common routine even in the middle of the nite. Hang in there Mike it does get better because we are designed to be able to bounce back.

It really made a difference to get hooked up with a friend last night get out of the house and just forget about all my issues and just live a little. I went out to dinner and had Chinese food last night. Then we thought about hanging out at a bar in McCall but it was not all that it was cracked up to be. We left McCall and headed back to my place being at least warm and comfortable. Everyone around here is out of sorts being we all seemed to stay up fairly late last night. Seriously I did enjoy just letting go for a short time and enjoying life again. 

 

You have to remember you become kind of self-conscious being you can feel the bags tied to your legs but no one can see them. This will become my new normal and it is taking some time to get used to the feeling of the two bags and the tubing coming out of my back. 

 

I know I've hinted at something in my last post too. I've got another secret that I've been playing with as well. It started out as something fun to do as an alter ego. My past girlfriend helped me get started a bit but when she broke up I ended up continuing on my own. I know that @IBMobile posted about the blue and black hair wig I've got. This has grown too. I've got black and blue, black and purple, and a few other colors I've collected then I started adding makeup to make it more Goth or Emo Goth appearance. Last night I was dressed up in my black and blue hair and makeup, spike collar, and wristbands and wandered the city of McCall which is a town of rich and well-to-do. I had a blast where many people commented about my hair and makeup. 

 

Sadly I didn't get a photo of my artwork... So this a previous using my black and purple. Be aware most will be shocked to see the altered me. I partied like it was the last day of the year...

 

 

 

Mike it's time to get your bear skins out and bundle up like the Eskimo. They are predicting snow starting on the 6th.

 

 It may come with a lasting vengeance since the last time a mild December like this was in 1950 and the following January had lots of snow. In 1950 that December was the warmest ever recorded and our recent one being the second warmest ever, they now see weather patterns changing that bring snow. They do not know how much as it's too early to tell. Best to be prepared my friend

 

 

 

Where? Geez no snow. Even the ski resorts are short on snow.

We may be getting some here in ohio Saturday. So far they say possibly 1-3 inches 

Well let's see... This is not my first winter. Then 5 years of driving to Boise / Ontario in the winter. I've seen ugly where you can no longer see the definition of the road because it drifted flat and no reflectors poles now that is ugly.

 

Heck I'm the Mopar1973Man I designed Beast to run in this kind of foul weather. 

 

Oh. Tidbit Beast is almost back from the moon. 475,4xx just need another 600 miles and I'll be back. Now load Beast up again head back to the moon. Being ill be on the highway for my medical treatment.

6 hours ago, Doubletrouble said:

We may be getting some here in ohio Saturday. So far they say possibly 1-3 inches 

At least we get some promise of a winter Doubletrouble. I am very hopeful and thankful for any sign of winter coming as there has been very little cold so far. I thought it would help to know that it wasn't our first nor the warmest December ever too finding out that 1950 had the warmest ever. Makes me very happy.

33 minutes ago, JAG1 said:

I thought it would help to know that it wasn't our first nor the warmest December ever too finding out that 1950 had the warmest ever.

 

You need stop sharing useless facts!  Now!  We have no use for useless facts!

 

In case you haven't heard, we are in a global warming trend.  This has to be the warmest winter ever!  It just has to be! For everyone!  Everywhere!

 

Oh no!  I just found out it's supposed to snow tonight - that's going to wreck everything.

 

- John

 

 

I hope your right Tractorman, that we do start swinging the other way and trend cooler.  I have been wondering since I have seen some of my trees burned on the sunny side, very unusual, all the way from top to bottom. Never happened before for 60/ 70 feet. It was 116 F. for the highest temperatures for that week. They say weather compensates so when you get a long hot trend, often means there will be a long cooling trend. Or a deep low pressure conversly means you will get a strong higher pressure. Therefore Mopar Man best get ready, I think it's coming.

I don't know about ya'll but the older I get the more I don't like the cold so I'm a fan of global warming!

53 minutes ago, Doubletrouble said:

I don't know about ya'll but the older I get the more I don't like the cold so I'm a fan of global warming!

Except I have seen extreme fire danger with unbelievable explosive conditions. I have to run 40 ft. radius sprinklers 3 of them 24/7 for three weeks each summer to keep my forest hydrated. The trees look happier, just like the old days of Oregon forests when the PNW was a cool climate. I think it will swing back again someday.

 

Again it got so bad that we where forced to evacuate. I saw a hot dry east wind that dried out and curled leaves on the undergrowth of my forest land in just a few hours like they were dying. It was a real awakening. All the evergreen trees did a bit better until the 116 degree day that sunburned the whole half of some evergreen needle trees.

Heck I had zero water for irrigation and my lawn last summer fried to a burn crisp. Then the fall rains came and every came back like if the Good Lord had his own plans. Even right now my water line is cut up in 4 places which will need to be repaired this spring. I don't listen to the media hype of "climate change" or "global warming" this has been proven to be all fake man made BS so the govt can tax us more for fossil fuels for a fake problem. No I'm not worried about winter being late iv3 seen this several times. Nothing new here.

I am not an advocate of the political mandated aspects to climate change. I am just stating what I have seen in recent years, it's alarming but, I also hope to live long enough to see the weather begin to flip flop and compensate back to what it used to be.  My experience (living and working outdoors for 40 years) causes me to easily get excited about anything forthcoming weather in the right direction. I'm still a kid... what can I say?